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Boost Your Self-confidence: 9 Easy Hints
Shannon Columbo
Whether you are
looking for a new job or going on a first date, one of the most
important characteristics that will stand you in good stead is your
self-confidence. Increase your self-confidence with these tactics to
help you through interviews, meetings, and more.
1. Stop saying “should”
Don’t make yourself feel guilty by thinking about the things that you
should have done: if something is in the past, let it pass. Fretting
over it will not improve your situation. Try using the word “could”
instead of “should” for everything. This way, your actions become your
choices, and you are empowered to make decisions. For instance, “I
should mow the lawn,” becomes “I could mow the lawn,” which is a much
more positive statement. Instead of allowing your tasks to hold power
over you, take power for yourself by actively choosing how to spend your
time.
2. Don’t focus on yourself
If you are stressed out in a public situation, consider how the other
person must feel. Go out of your way to make the other person feel
comfortable, or introduce two people who haven’t met. Set yourself small
tasks. Just having a task to do will make you feel better.
If you are alone and feeling anxious, take a few deep breaths. You can
try various techniques, from meditation to distraction to take your mind
off of you.
3. Set realistic goals
Setting goals will help boost your self-confidence. You want to set
goals that are attainable. Choose something that you can measure, rather
than something that is hard to measure so this way you will have a way
to chart your progress. For instance, rather than saying “I will become
an expert on the Victorian period,” you could set yourself the task of
reading the complete works of Jane Austen, or you could sign up for a
course at the local university. Chart your progress. Keeping track of
how you are doing will allow you to feel positive about yourself.
4. Surround yourself with positives
If there are things or places in your life that are bringing you down,
avoid them. If there are people in your life who are constantly
negative, it might be time to reconsider your friendship with these
people. You want to surround yourself with people who are optimistic and
caring, people who respect you and value you for who you are. It is
easier to be self-confident when you know you have a network of
supportive people around you.
5. Stop being critical
Stop comparing yourself to others with self-criticism. You will always
find something that someone else is better at. You are an individual,
and unlike anyone else, so comparisons are moot. Constant self-criticism
can also turn into cattiness: to make yourself feel better you might
point out flaws in other people. Choosing to focus on your positive
traits and on other people’s positive traits will help you gain
self-confidence.
6. Take the time you need
Take some time for yourself. Perhaps painting your nails or polishing
your shoes will make you feel that much more empowered. Take the time to
do small things that are often overlooked. This time you spend will help
you gain confidence.
It is important to learn that you are worth making time for. You will
never be able to adequately care for another person until you care for
yourself, so take time to unwind and relax.
7. Think positively
If you find yourself thinking negative or critical thoughts, think
“cancel” or “delete.” Your mind is like a computer, and you will be able
to erase those negative thought patterns with practice. Then, once you
have pointedly erased that negative thought, replace it with a positive
one. If you were thinking “My thighs are too fat,” say, “cancel” and
then, “My thighs are growing thinner every day” or “I love my body just
the way I am.” Try saying these nice things to yourself in front of a
mirror.
Write down your best traits, abilities, and skills on a piece of paper.
Then when you are feeling down you can come back to this piece of paper
to remember how wonderful you are. You can also write down five or ten
things that you are grateful for each day. Remember how fortunate we are
helps boost confidence because it helps surround us with the positivity
that is required for true self-confidence.
Try visualization to help you with achieving your goals, and to help you
think positively towards a sense of self-confidence.
8. Reprogram yourself
You might hold some beliefs which are limiting to you. It is time to
take these negative thoughts and replace them with positives, as
outlined in the previous point. Here are some thoughts you might need to
re-think (literally!): “I can’t do that,” “I get scared easily,” “They
don’t like me.”
Remember that even confident people get bummed out sometimes. Having
occasional periods of anxiety is completely natural.
9. Fake it…and Smile!
If you don’t know how to truly be self-confident, then just pretend to
be self-confident! Smile, too. Just the act of smiling will release
endorphins to the brain, which will eventually make you happy. Acting
confident will help build your confidence for when you truly are
confident.
Remember: you are going to be fine. Start building your self-confidence
today so that you can begin leading the lifestyle you deserve.
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To get
a new job to match your new lifestyle, or if you apply this advice so
that you can find a new job, visit
www.theguideto-resumes.com/writing_a_resume/objective_statements/”The
Guide to Resumes. You can shine, so why not let your employer know your
value? |
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